The Time Has Come...

Growing up, I was always the bigger girl. I heard the words big-boned, fat, “your size”, and chunky. Those were the ones that described me, and that started at probably around seven or eight. The worst part was that as a seven year old, I totally understood what that meant. It meant that something was wrong with me, or so that was how people made it out. I mean, what is worse than being told that girls “your size” can’t do something BECAUSE of your size? Or that you aren’t pretty because you are a certain size.

I’m sure each woman has been commented on about their body. Whether it is you were too skinny or too big or too tall or too short; whatever the case, it never makes us feel very good, and only makes us look at ourselves with self-hatred. Society’s view on body image only intensifies that self-hatred. After all, you can’t turn on the television without some sort of diet commercial telling you how to get your perfect body, or some seemingly flawless model sporting Victoria Secret lingerie, that you could only dream of looking that good in.

Personally, I think it’s time for a change, and since we can’t change the world’s opinion… then we change our own.

I am a twenty-two year old woman going for her Bachelor’s Degree in Sociology and working. I am married to an amazing man who loves me just the way I am. Sounds like someone who should be, if not completely then at least somewhat, passed this obsession of looking perfect. However, I have went through years where I would constantly put myself down because I’m not a size 2 or even a 4 (BTW I’m only a size 8); because I didin't fit the mold of what is "hot".  I would critique my skin, my hair, my legs, my “whiteness”, etc. I mean, really it gots ridiculous the stuff that I put myself down for. What’s bad is that a lot of these things I couldn't and can't do anything about. For example, my face broke out horribly one time (A very common thing for people in general), even though I washed my face religiously morning and night. I felt horrible and disgusting because of some acne that I couldn’t get rid of immediately. After all, those of you who have problem skin know that it takes time to get rid of. So, I was basically depressed because on top of how fat I kept telling myself I was, I also had blemished skin. Sad stuff, right?...

True Beauty Journal is all about looking at your-self in a new and healthier way.

On one of those days when I felt bad about the way I looked, I found myself making a personal creed, since I had such a problem with putting myself down. It goes something like this:

v  I will NOT say I look ugly

v  I will NOT say I look fat

v  I will NOT compare myself to other women

v  I will accept the things I cannot change about myself

v  I will work on those things I know I can change

v  I will remember my best features when I am feeling down (not just physical ones, but about myself in general)

v  I will be confident in ME

It probably sounds silly to a lot of you, but the truth is, most of us are so busy beating ourselves up because we don’t look like someone else that we forget the important things about ourselves. Okay, so you don’t look like this person… big deal, you look like you, and there are some pretty special things about you. Such as… no one else looks like YOU in the entire world. Hard to believe, right? I’d say that makes you pretty darn special and beautifully unique.

Beauty isn’t about being perfect. Beauty is about being healthy and happy with who you are and what you look like, and then having confidence in that. If you think you should lose weight, then do it, but do it for you and do it to be healthy. Do NOT do it because you think you are required to have the body of someone else to look good. If you have bad skin, so what! Did you know that acne affects 40 to 50 million Americans? It is actually considered “the most common skin disorder in the United States (American Academy of Dermatology). So you aren’t the only one who suffers from it. Look past the blemishes to the beauty underneath. In fact, forget that they are even there. Life is too important to be stressing a few blemishes.

The point is, if we want to appear beautiful to others, we have to see ourselves as beautiful first. Stop the comparing, and wishing, and degrading. Put on those imaginary, self-appreciating spectacles and see how beautiful you truly are. Be happy with who you are. If you aren’t happy, then change those things you can and want to change, but for the right reasons. Do it for YOU, and not because someone else says beauty is a specific hair color with a specific body size and perfect skin. It’s time to see your-self more clearly. So follow me on the road to self-ratification. Be happy. Be Healthy. Be Be-YOU-tiful.